Elizabeth Taylor whose life was a legacy of great cinema, beauty, jewels, love, good times, bad times, and, above all else, AIDS advocacy has been dead in her grave in Forest Lawn Memorial Park in Burbank, California since March 23rd of 2011, and we already have a biopic coming out on, all of channels, Lifetime-the quintessential "women are victims or sociopaths who'll burn a man in his bed if he cheats on her" channel. The greatest honor of it all, however, is that Lindsay Lohan is playing (bastardizing) Elizabeth Taylor.
The Lifetime TV movie, Liz & Dick, will chronicle the tumultuous Hollywood love affair between the violet-eyed Elizabeth Taylor and the alpha male Richard Burton. As most of us know, Lindsay Lohan has been in and out of court like it's a swinging door into her favorite coke party, has had numerous hit and run wrecks, ankle monitoring bracelets, and her rap sheet goes to infinity and beyond. Maybe, just maybe, all of that could be overlooked if she could act, but she can't. She probably couldn't even remember the lines to the Kit Kat commercial jingle were she given that gig.
On top of not being able to act, there is no resemblance between her and Elizabeth Taylor. At this point in Lindsay Lohan's life, she looks like she has had so many collagen and botox injections that she's at 50 and holding, but how long can the 26 year old maintain that look is questionable. The only clips that have shown a vague resemblance between Lohan and Taylor take place in the mid-life crisis period of Taylor's life, around the 1970s, when Taylor had some facial bloat. Lohan has that sickish, alcohol bloat on the daily, so she had that going for her during make-up and costume prep.
On the set, there have been rumors and whisperings of her stealing expensive and priceless set pieces, and even trashing the original on-set trailer that Taylor stayed in during the filming of the epic Cleopatra, which, of course, she later denied. While filming was underway, she stayed at the Chateau Marmont and drove up a bill somewhere in the neighborhood of $46,000, and she is now conveniently persona non grata.
Lohan may have envisioned this role as her comeback or in the words of Norma Desmond, "I hate that word. It's a return, a return to the millions of people who have never forgiven me for deserting the screen." Lohan may you not have the same, tragic fate of Desmond in Sunset Blvd, but I do hope you'll desert the screen just not on a deathbed.
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